Regular Old Tuesday

I don't know where in life I learned how to get bored easily and become unsatisfied quickly. It's a horrible trait, one of the things I hate most about myself.

It's so easy to become unhappy with life's circumstances, which leads to bitterness. Bitter. Something I'm deathly afraid of becoming. I often find myself unhappy with how my day is going, how I'm keeping up with the house, how I'm teaching the kids, how good (or not good) of a wife I'm being.

The good news is that God has a plan and a promise. Even for the "lowly house wife" or the mom of two kids, or the business owner, or the sister. Me. God has a plan and a purpose to use me in my "mundane" daily activities. So whenever I get caught up or unsatisfied with how my life is at the moment, I'm immediately stopped in my destructive thoughts and encouraged that I get to be a part of building His Kingdom in heaven. His perfect and beautiful Kingdom.

Now that's something I can get excited about (and, of course, moments like these when they aren't trying to kick or pinch each other).

Penelope at 18 Months

Our sweet sunshine. Little Duck. Peppy. Pippa. Penny. Elopie. Whatever her name… she's now 18 months old and has completely run away with our hearts. The older she gets, the more her little personality shines through and it's such a joy to watch!




At 18 months old, she weighs in at 22 pounds (14th percentile). She is the messiest eater, and will eat anything and everything. Including but not limited to: beets, brussels sprouts, play dough, pickles, rocks, left over raisins from the floor, barbecue chicken pizza, broccoli, month-old popcorn from the couch cushions, etc. I don't know where she puts it for weighing as little as she does!

She loves her baby doll, Rue, but also cannot part with her blessed Zoe dog. She sucks her thumb and holds Zoe's tail in her fist to soothe herself. She sleeps like a charm (thank the Lord!), wakes up happily (mostly) and loves to egg on her big brother.

She wasn't saying much until a couple weeks ago, but in those weeks, has been attempting to say almost everything she hears. Other words used commonly: Stop, Oweee (ouch), Noooo (do you see a pattern here? She does have a big brother…), meow (for the cat), Pippee (for herself), Zo Zo (for Zoe), PopPop, gum, please, thank you, more, sunshine, outside, "Where's _____ (meow, mama, dada, ZoZo, etc), Elsa, Annah and Olaf (yes, from Frozen), popcorn, snack…. among other words.

She's running, chasing, playing tag, doing gymnastics, singing and dancing. She smiles without ceasing and knows full-well how cute she is. Anyone who will glance her way, she'll give a coy smile, nuzzle her head to the side and bat her eyelashes. And we're all wrapped around her tiny finger (which she has requested that I paint pink).

Penelope Cate. We love you so.

Quitting.

(Disclaimer: I ramble. So this post serves mainly that I can come back to this 10 years from now and remember this season in my life).

I am twenty-eight years old living with my dear husband and my two small children. I own and run a small business (full-time) while managing to be a Mama to Camden (3 years old) and Penelope (1 year and a half old). My days usually begin with a quiet kiss good-bye from Bobby, followed a few minutes later by small, shuffling feet over to my side of the bed. "Good morning, Mama… milk??" Still half asleep, I fumble downstairs to gather a matching lid to its partner cup, fill it with milk, heat it (to just the right "nice and warm" temperature!), slump back upstairs and turn on some TV so I can get another 5 minutes of sleep. Not 2 minutes after I'm back in bed with Camden curled up next to me, do I hear a chirping noise from down the hall, calling "Mamaaaaa!" I poke my head in the door of Penelope's room to find her standing up in her crib, sucking her thumb and swaying to the song she knows I'll always sing to her first thing in the morning: "good morning to you, good morning to you…" (in the tune of "Happy Birthday.") Delighted, she squeals, picks up her Zoe dog by the tail and lifts her arms to reach for me. How can I be disgruntled at that wake-up routine?! Once Penelope's finished her milk and watched the "Let it Go" music video for the 40th time, we tickle each other in the "big bed" for a few minutes and head downstairs for some much-needed coffee…and I suppose breakfast :)

Our days are usually filled with trivial things, in which I tend to get lost. I lose scope of what my job is, exactly. Wife? Mother? Photographer? Business owner? Neighbor? Friend? Some days, I find myself so burdened with fulfilling those relationships (or not fulfilling them). I get physically tired and easily frustrated. I get so overwhelmed, then I shut down and want to quit everything I'm committed to and just paint my toe nails and eat cookies.


Quitting is easy. Quitting feels good when you're just so tired.





When I get lost  in trying to do everything myself - in my own strength - and start to get run down, I strap the kids in the car, head down the road and pray. I cannot do wife, Mama, business owner, etc all on my own. I don't want to be a cold wife, a yelling mom, a non-responsive owner, a flighty friend… I can't quit all of those responsibilities and relationships. So, I ask the Lord for strength. The Lord, who I've turned to throughout my whole life, has always filled me up with His comfort and Holy Spirit. The Lord, who renews His mercies for our mistakes DAILY.


"The Lord is my Shepard, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters. He restores my soul." -- Psalm 23



It's such a basic and steadfast verse, but it is so refreshing to hear EVERY DAY.

My beautiful sister-in-law told me a few weeks ago, "this is the hardest season of life, where you are. How are you holding up?" I wanted to cry, rejoice and hug my kids all at once. I'm sure every season of life has its difficulties, but I suddenly felt so much relief when I could admit that this was a really hard season of life. Marriage is hard, and it's hard when there are two, small, depend and children constantly at your heels. Being a friend is hard, and it's hard when you have two kids on different nap schedules and you can barely find five minutes to sit down and eat lunch, let alone make a phone call or answer an e-mail. Running a business is hard, but it's also hard when you can only work when you have a magical (but non-consistent) babysitter or when they're sleeping. Life is hard, which is why Jesus calls us to Him for rest and relief.

There will be struggles at every stage of life, I'm certain. But I'm thankful for the Holy Spirit and the restoration that comes along with asking Him into my heart. I'm thankful for so many things. I'm sorry for so many things. I'll always want to be better. But for now, I think I'm going to snuggle with all three of my loves, who are waiting for me in "mama's big bed" to tuck them in for the night.

But first, I'm going to paint my toes and eat a cookie ;)

(All of that being said, I have little time anymore to write my personal blog. I love writing, and I love recording our life for us to look back on 10 years from now. So if you want to follow our day-to-day happenings, you can find me on Instagram @sweetmelissa_b. I promise to fill your feed with pictures of my babes, our cat and the occasional baked good!)

The One Where Our Baby Turned One

…. and now she's a year old.

It may have been since August that I last blogged, but let me assure you. Seven months have gone by and a lifetime of changes. Let me fill you in on the last few months.

- Christmas happened, and it was magical with two children
- We spent New Year's at home together with cousins
- Camden learned how to swim
- Bobby ran his first full marathon
- Melissa ran her first half-marathon
- Penelope started crawling (November)
- Camden got his first big boy bike (with training wheels) and scooter (only two wheels) and rides them like a boss
- Penelope started eating real foods and wants to do everything herself
- Camden started "school" (Mother's Day Out program) and loves it
- Camden gave up his "suckie" (pacifier) AND is now potty-trained
- Penelope started doing her sign language (the basics)
- Penelope decided to start walking more than crawling at her first birthday party
- SHE TURNS ONE TODAY

Not a day goes by that I don't cherish this time when my babies are small, innocent and dependent on me and Bobby. I love it and I hate it that they are getting big. We have hard days (like, really hard) and we have wonderful days. I am so in love with our little family of four and I'm so thankful for all the Lord has blessed us with. So, so grateful.

Our little baby has filled our hearts with so much joy! She is so pleasant and cheerful. She is always smiling, and has recently developed an adventurous spirit… no doubt, taking after her big brother. She loves to eat and be held. She adores any toy with a face: babies, animals, bugs, etc. She will smile and then give them a BIG hug. She'll crush a big bowl of frozen blueberries for breakfast every morning, crawl faster than her brother can run (or so it seems), and is happy to be around people. She sleeps like a dream and loves to nurse (yes, we're still breastfeeding).  She carries her precious Zoe dog (stuffed animal lovie) around by her stubby tail, sucks her thumb to her hearts content, and squeals with joy when Camden spares a second of time to play with her. Her first word (besides Mama and Dada) was "shoes" and her first sign was "milk." She has big brown eyes, and the softest, sweetest-smelling wispy brown hair. Her nose wrinkles up when she smiles, showing off her big girl teeth (7 teeth now!).

We just love our precious Penelope Cate.

We celebrated her birthday yesterday with so many friends and family! Appropriately, Penelope carried around a balloon all afternoon for her…balloon party. There are tons more pictures coming soon, but here's our baby over the year.

Happy Birthday to you!

Penelope at Five Months

Is it really five months already?? I don't think I can handle this. She's my baby. By itty bitty baby with perfect skin and who sleeps like a dream.

This girl amazes me more and more every day. She is just such a good baby. I thought I had it good with Camden. But this girl. This girl. I tell everyone I see just how thankful I am that she is an easy baby. She is happy when she's awake (except sometimes in the evening - I think she's trying to get some teeth to break through), she goes to sleep as soon as she's put down, and can usually pacify herself with that blessed thumb if needed. She travels in the car, happily singing along the way (I call her my "Little Lark"). She smiles with even the slightest glance in her direction, and she LOVES watching her big brother.

She's rolling over like a champ now and pushing up on her arms. In the last few days, she's gotten extremely wiggly...like Camden was. Daddy says she's gonna be a mover like her brother! She is able to sit up briefly unassisted, but not consistently. She has the most amazing manual dexterity... she can grab at things and use her pinchers to grab smallish objects in her reach. And my favorite thing, she's discovered her feet and can't get enough!

Here's our sweet girl at Five Months Old. Can't believe it.